Flash News: The Leap

It was a fine and relaxing day yet, I am troubled and deep in thought. Why you ask? Because I am about to confess to a girl. And it would be the first time again after 3 years! 

I recently found a girl who caught my attention and as soon as I began to know her, I became more interested in her little by little. The days gone by, and I eventually developed feelings for her up to the point where I could not hide it any longer. So after the long struggle of hiding and suppressing it, here it is! The Confession. At first we went with our usual conversation and little by little I tried to slip in the topic of who does she like. Even though this is a huge risk (to my emotions) for she might mention some other guy's name, I still went and did it. The conversation went on and on as we bugged each other who we like until I finally could not hold it in any longer and confessed. And the moment of truth is approaching. Time slowed down and I could hear the beat of my heart as I became worried and frightened about her reply. After a while there it is, her answer... She likes me too! 

But the bad news is, she made it clear between the two of us that nothing will change. For she does not want any commitment right now. I am not the type to rush things, so I can wait. I will be waiting, because I know that she will be worth the wait.

Travelogue: Sunset at UP

At my 2nd year of taking A.B. English at NCBA, I came upon a project where we will select an English song and translate it to Filipino. After that we will make a music video with it. So as always, my friends and I were on the same group. We chose a song that seemed easy to be translated. When you say Nothing At All is the title of the song. Now, having a group where all the members (even me) are lazy bumps, we have not done any progress with our project. It was only until there was only a day left before the deadline where we started to act. We went to a studio to record the song, and looked for a place with good scenery. Then we came across U.P. The scenery was breathtaking. If only I had brought a tent, I would have stayed there. The wide field, the breeze of the wind brushing against your skin. It was all too relaxing. But what stunned me the most was the sunset I saw that day. If only I had a good camera that time I would have taken a picture of that beautiful moment. That sunset reminded me of my childhood days-- where I used to climb trees and sit at the branches while looking at the setting of the sun. The sun is almost gone and dawn is arriving. So we packed up and went home.

 I reached home and I was really exhausted. I lied down on my bed for a few minutes and then I suddenly remembered U.P. again. I am still recalling the image of the sunset that day in my head. I hope I could see that beauty once again.

Diary #4: The Boundary

3 days had passed since I got confused about what or who am I to her. I had been trying to just get it off my mind, but it was difficult to do so. I tried to act normally whenever we talked with each other. But as the days go by, the feeling get stronger. The more I talk to her, the more I want to get closer to her. I want to know more about her... I want to be with her... I want her. But it was not the right time for her. She had other things she wanted to reach first. Then I will wait. I know it looked foolish, but I really will. I don't want anyone but her. But what am I to her exactly? That was when I thought of putting a stop to this feeling. I do not want to trouble her. If I let this go on, I cannot promise that I would be able to stop myself from falling for her. I am falling? It had been a while since I felt this way. For 3 years I only found admiration to a few girls, but with her, everything seemed different. It somehow felt light, yet frightening.

 23rd OF AUGUST. I tried to avoid her, but in a way that was unnoticeable. I was hoping that the feeling would eventually fade. It was also my way of knowing if she cared. If she noticed the change, then that means she cares. But if she does not, then I am just nothing to her. "I am nothing to her..." Just the thought itself pierced my chest. We talked as usual that day, then night came and it was still the usual. I was starting to lose hope until she spoke up. She said...

She noticed. It was like a thorn was removed from my throat. I felt relieved. I opened up to her about my feelings that and (I think) she got mad because I was jumping to conclusions about me troubling her. I looked so stupid that night, but even so, I felt relieved. Her words enlightened me once again. The future is something we look forward to, and the present is what we should cherish. What we have right now is what is important, and that is all that matters.

Diary #3: Confusion

7TH OF AUGUST, SUNDAY.
I got off my bed around 5 p.m. as always. It was the usual day for me, but I was not my usual self. Because everyday as I woke up, I have something to look forward to. I looked at my messages and saw something that placed a smile on my face. It was her. Do not get the wrong idea. It was not a sweet message from her. It was just a typical reply. I do not know if there was something wrong with my head, but It made me smile just seeing her name. After looking dumb for a few minutes, I went to the church and attended a mass. It was my usual routine every Sunday. After that, I went home and did my usual routine as a lazy bump until the night ended. The days gone by and we were still in contact with each other. I do no know if we were getting closer and closer, or am I just getting more attached to her. I do not know which is which until the 12th of August.

It was the usual day until I overhead something that stopped me with what I am doing at that moment. A certain guy was interested in her. I tried to calm down thinking it was just nothing, but as I saw them tease her to the guy almost made me snapped. Shut up! She's mine. I wanted to tell them. Mine? Is she really? We have no commitment with each other. There was nothing that bounds the two of us. So, who am I to claim her as mine? I just put my earphones on and turned the music volume to its maximum so that I would not hear them anymore. But my curiosity is killing me. What are they talking about? I looked away and stared at the view outside. Hoping the day would just end.

Life in NCBA: My First Song

At the 3rd year of my staying at National College of Business and Arts, I have witnessed many activities and events. I was forced to participate in the "Likhang Awit" contest, where you would make your own song. It was at the spur of the moment when I was informed so I am not quite prepared for it. I spent all night coming up with the lyrics and tone. They said find an inspiration. So I asked my self that night, "Inspiration?" and she was the only one I could think of. I recalled all my experiences and moments that revolved around her, and before I knew it, I had created a song. Although it is rushed. I am not good at singing so I had someone to sing it for me. At the day of the competition, I was so nervous. The participants were too good for me. I went out the AVR (the venue) to calm myself down for awhile. I went to the washroom to relax myself, and as I was washing my hands, I received a message from her. She's wishing me good luck. It may seem like a simple good luck, but it really helped me out. My nervousness lessen down, and calmly waited for our turn. Long story short, we did not win. I made a few mistakes with our performance but we managed to get through. Even though we lost, I did not feel down. Maybe it is because for the first time ever, I made my own song. And to think it was about her puts a smile on my face. I may not have won that contest, but I think I won something much better.

(Throwback) A picture of me when I was just learning to play the guitar. :)

Speech: Open Your Eyes

The Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant or as we all commonly know as ISIS has once again caught the attention of the mass. As they have claimed responsibility for the devastating blast on Sunday, 3rd of July in Karada, a predominantly Shia neighborhood. The people blames the government for the incident. Of course! Why wouldn't they? More than 200 people were killed and most of them were women and children. It is said that the government placed hundreds of checkpoints around the capital, and yet, a vehilcle packed with explosives managed to get pass through these so called "checkpoints". And to think it was during the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, after they had broken their fast. It was at the time where the people were vulnerable, and yet the government had failed to secure or protect those people from harm. The security itself can be considered useless. Absolutely useless. Right now, at this very moment, lives could be in danger. We, humans are fragile. So fragile that we could be in harm's way at any time. As the people who we rely on when it comes to protection, secure us. Protect your people. Do not let hundreds of lives be taken away once again. This is not business my dear officials, it is a matter of life and death. Open your eyes.

Travelogue: SMX

On the 16th of February, year 2015, My Bestfriend asked me to come with him for his assignment. So, as usual I had nothing planned that day. I went with him. I first went to Morayta, to look for him. It is the place where we were supposed to meet up. As I am waiting for him, I saw FEU-- the place I go to back then. I remembered all the things I experienced there. It somehow felt nostalgic as I stare at the tall building that I used to enter. When he finally arrived, we immediately began to travel. We were going to SMX Convention Center. So we took the FX to North Ave. and then took the MRT to TAFT Ave. That MRT ride was quite long if I would recall. We talked about how we were both doing and told interesting stories that we experienced after I transferred schools. As we stepped out of the station, we immediately searched and asked around the place for directions. We reached SMX around 3 p.m. and we were starving. We forgot to eat because we were worried that we might not be able to catch up with the event.

Inside the SMX was so wide and quite cold. We then immediately rushed to the venue and started doing his assignments. He collected brochures of different countries and listed down the different tour spots for the tourists. We also came across with cosplayers giving out brochures for Japan. My bestfriend had always wanted to take a picture with cosplayers so he took the chance while we were at it. Then he said I should take one too, at first I did not want to. But thinking that we do not always get this chance, I just went and did it anyways. We finished his assignment around 6 p.m. and after that we parted ways once again and went to our own homes. It was a tiring day, but it was fun and worth it.